
Pity Me, County Durham
Analytics in Pity Me
Nobody in Pity Me rings the third-best website. They ring the first one they trust.
from £200
What analytics looks like round here
Set up tracking so you know what's actually making you money.
We work with Pity Me businesses the same way we work with everyone: you tell us what you need, we tell you what it costs, and then we build it. No discovery workshops, no mood boards, no account manager ringing you for a "quick sync".
Why Pity Me businesses call us
- Local pages that rank for "analytics pity me"
- One price, agreed up front, in writing
- You speak to the person building it
- Live in weeks, not quarters
- Own your site, your domain and your data
Population 0 — plenty of people who could be buying off you.
Analytics — the Pity Me map
Landmarks pulled live from OpenStreetMap. We know where Pity Me is, and so will Google when your site goes live.
Analytics, and a word about Pity Me
Pity Me is small, and small is fine. One clear page that loads fast beats a twenty-page monster nobody reads.
Most local sites we're sent have the same three faults: it takes an age to load, the phone number's an image, and the last update was a Christmas opening hours post from years back. All three are fixable in an afternoon.
You talk to the person building it. No account manager, no ticket queue, no "circling back".
Send us the name of your Pity Me business and what you want it to do. We'll come back with a price and a date.
Real-world example
Example: Analytics in Pity Me
Bellamy Trading — Pity Me. Names changed, jobs didn't.
The state of it
They had a Facebook page and a phone number written on a van. That was the whole marketing strategy.
What we built
- Real photos of real work — no handshakes, no stock nonsense
- Quote form that lands in your inbox and your phone in seconds
- A one-page-per-thing structure so Google knows exactly what you sell
- A simple editor so they can change prices without ringing us
- Area pages for every town they cover
What happened
Enquiries went from a trickle to a queue. They've since put a second van on the road.
7 → 45
Enquiries / month
7.3s → 1.4s
Load time
12 days
Built in
£1150
Cost
"First web person who told me what it cost before I'd finished the sentence."
Also in Pity Me: Digital Marketing
Everything below has its own Pity Me page — same fixed pricing, same plain English.
Analytics without the Pity Me bit
The national pages, if you'd rather read the detail before we talk postcodes.
Conversion Optimisation
Turn more of your existing visitors into paying customers.
from £350More digital marketingEmail Marketing
Newsletters, promotions and automated sequences that get opened.
from £79/moMore digital marketingFacebook Ads
Targeted campaigns that drive leads, sales or foot traffic.
from £300/mo + spendAnalytics near Pity Me
Same price, same turnaround, different postcode. Distances are from Pity Me town centre.
- Analytics in Framwellgate Moornext door
- Analytics in Newton Hall1 km
- Analytics in Kimblesworth2 km
- Analytics in Brasside2 km
- Analytics in Whitesmocks2 km
- Analytics in Tan Hills2 km
- Analytics in Nettlesworth2 km
- Analytics in Plawsworth3 km
- Analytics in Western Hill3 km
- Analytics in Sacriston3 km
- Analytics in Crossgate Moor3 km
- Analytics in Durham3 km

Tell us what you need
Send a couple of lines about your business. You'll get a straight answer and a price within one working day.
- 07932 064593· Text us
- info@websitesnobollocks.com
- All over the UK · Mon–Fri 8am–6pm


