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NEWCASTLE UPON TYNE

Web design in Spital Tongues

A proper website for Spital Tongues, minus the jargon and the six-month wait.

Nobody in Spital Tongues has ever said 'what a lovely carousel'. We build sites that sell instead.

No Bollocks owl mascot

The landmark, and something about Spital Tongues

Our owl had a nosy round the area so you don't have to.

A word about Spital Tongues

Spital Tongues is small, and small is fine. One clear page that loads fast beats a twenty-page monster nobody reads.

Most local sites we're sent have the same three faults: it takes an age to load, the phone number's an image, and the last update was a Christmas opening hours post from years back. All three are fixable in an afternoon.

We're not local to Spital Tongues, and we won't pretend to be. We just build the site, you keep running the business, and nobody has to sit through a meeting.

One email, one straight answer, one price. That's the Spital Tongues process.

What we build for Spital Tongues businesses

Same four things, done properly, for whoever's paying.

Brochure sites

Five or six pages that explain what you do and get people ringing.

Online shops

Take money without paying a developer every time a price changes.

Booking systems

Let people book a slot instead of playing voicemail tennis.

Local SEO

Turn up when someone nearby searches for what you sell.

The Spital Tongues landmark map

Pulled live from OpenStreetMap. Handy for the photos on your homepage — and proof we know where Spital Tongues actually is.

Free Spital Tongues flyer, with QR code

Yours to print, no strings. Scan it and you land back here.

Real-world example

Example: A proper website in Spital Tongues

Nowak ServicesSpital Tongues. Names changed, jobs didn't.

The state of it

They had a Facebook page and a phone number written on a van. That was the whole marketing strategy.

What we built

  • A one-page-per-thing structure so Google knows exactly what you sell
  • A simple editor so they can change prices without ringing us
  • Area pages for every town they cover
  • Plain-English pricing so time-wasters filter themselves out
  • Reviews pulled in so new customers trust you before they ring

What happened

Enquiries went from a trickle to a queue. They've since put a second van on the road.

4 → 42

Enquiries / month

7.0s → 1.2s

Load time

14 days

Built in

£1400

Cost

"My nephew offered to do it for free. Glad I didn't let him."

Most-asked-for in Spital Tongues

Each one has its own Spital Tongues page, and a national page if you'd rather read the detail first.

Business Websites in Spital Tongues

Proper brochure sites that explain what you do and get the phone ringing.

Business Websites — the full detail

Trades Websites in Spital Tongues

Built for builders, plumbers, sparkies and anyone who works with their hands.

Trades Websites — the full detail

E-commerce Websites in Spital Tongues

Online shops that take money while you sleep. Payments, stock, delivery — sorted.

E-commerce Websites — the full detail

Local SEO in Spital Tongues

Show up in your town when customers search for your trade.

Local SEO — the full detail

Logo Design in Spital Tongues

Clean marks that work on vans, websites, shirts and tiny favicons.

Logo Design — the full detail

Google Ads in Spital Tongues

Search and display campaigns that target people ready to buy.

Google Ads — the full detail

Everything we do in Spital Tongues

Every service and sector gets its own Spital Tongues page — written for Newcastle upon Tyne, not copy-pasted with the name swapped in. Here's the lot, grouped so you can find yours.

SERVICES

AI & AUTOMATION

BRANDING & DESIGN

BUSINESS GROWTH

CONTENT CREATION

DIGITAL MARKETING

HOSTING & SUPPORT

PHOTOGRAPHY & VIDEO

PRINT DESIGN

SEO

SIGNS & DISPLAYS

SLATE CARVING

SOCIAL MEDIA

VEHICLE GRAPHICS

WEBSITE DESIGN

WORKWEAR

TRADES & PROPERTY

FOOD, DRINK & HOSPITALITY

RETAIL & E-COMMERCE

HEALTH & WELLBEING

PROFESSIONAL & FINANCIAL

MOTORING & TRANSPORT

EDUCATION, SPORT & LEISURE

CREATIVE, EVENTS & COMMUNITY

HOME & LIFESTYLE

INDUSTRY, FARMING & ENERGY

PETS, ANIMALS & OUTDOORS

TECH, MEDIA & MARKETING

PUBLIC, CARE & COMMUNITY

Can't see it? The content map lists every area and page we've written.

Fancy a straight answer and a fixed quote? Give us a shout.

I don't care about your kids or your dog — we build websites that get you customers